It would appear those smartphone ‘apps’ aren’t so smart after all! According to the journal ‘Sexual Transmitted Infections’, people who meet their sexual partners through dating apps such as Tinder and Grinder that use GPS to locate like-minded horney people in their vicinity for a quick shag, as opposed to meeting ‘online’ or in the pub, are more likely to catch an STI. In other words, depravity leads to gonorrhea and syphilis! Keep your private parts in check, or use protection! If you’ve got an itch you can’t scratch, masturbate, for better an itch you can’t scratch than an a painful itch you can’t get rig of! Switch your smartphone to vibrate, get someone to phone you…and then ‘get off’!