I heard a rumour the International Space Station occupying low Earth orbit is in a bit of financial bother. Since it opened for business in AD 2000 it has been re-mortgaged twice through HSBC, and is currently 6-years behind in payments despite favourable interest rates being offered. C0-ownership of the ISS is split between NASA, Roscosmos, JAXA, ESA and CSA, however no one at any of the agencies claims to know anything about the two re-mortgages. Fraud is suspected! In the meanwhile, astronautical bailiffs who trained for two years for their ‘repossession trip’ via shuttle, were confronted by a big man holding an axe when they arrived in space. “Solly, me no habla ingles!” Don’t you f**king hate that! Anyway, when the bailiffs finally forced entry in order to take charge of any fixtures and fittings, they discovered someone had been ‘cooking’…crystal meth!