DON’T LOSE YOUR HEAD IN SAUDI ARABIA!

Arab sword

Following the ‘arrival’ of new King Salman of the House of Saud in January 2015 and his intention to ‘clean house’, Saudi Arabia is on the hunt for 8 new executioners after a sudden rise in the number of death sentences passed. In 2014, 88 people were put to death. So far this year 85 people have already been legally murdered and it’s still only May! Since most Saudis don’t have access to 100+ television channels, public beheadings and limb amputations are as popular now as they have ever been. I’ve heard snack stand permits go for a premium!

So acceptable is ‘death’ as a form of state sponsored permanent punishment, that an advertisement for ‘Executioners Wanted’ has been posted on Saudi Government’s civil service job site, but not just anyone can apply. Would be killers must hold a Higher National Diploma in ‘Butchery’, must participate in a ‘practical demonstration of sword skills’, show a proficiency in ‘sword maintenance’, must enter a ‘timed’amputated limb stacking competition’ and must participate in an ‘Arab sword dance’ without once cutting oneself. ‘Union’ rates of pay vary according to whether the sentence carried out is a traditional beheading or a traditional limb amputation.  Oh, anyone suffering from Tourette’s syndrome need not apply! The Middle East…an enlightened place!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s