As from tomorrow morning I will be attempting to broaden my cultural horizons by learning to tap-dance! Normally I can take it or leave it, tap dancing, but at this particular juncture in my life I want to torment the thousands of termites that are eating me out of house and home. The next time I buy a recently built, timber-framed house I’ll make sure it doesn’t come with ‘living tenants’. Oh, termites are classified as a group of eusocial insects, in that there is a high level of organisational sociality. Huh, well that’s f**king good to know! Personally I’d reclassify the buggers as unsociable. Now wait ’til I perfect the heel tap!