We are told, thanks to an expanding population and a lax house building programme since the 2008 financial crash, causing numerous brick factories to be mothballed, affordable housing in Britain is in desperate short supply! In order to combat the absence of affordable roofs, hitherto protected Green Belt land will almost certainly be bulldozed in the very near future to build homes that no one can afford, since there aren’t enough usable, decontaminated brownfield sites which are deemed safe to build on! Therefore, once protected woodlands and forests…including Sherwood Forest, in which I once had a bloody good shit…will be felled. Never mind the disruption to indigenous animals and birds, what’s going to happen to the regular doggers who look forward to al fresco sex? Where are we supposed to go for our exercise that the government deems ‘essential’ for our well-being? It you ask me, it’s a f**king liberty! I suppose all I can do is open a bottle of LeapfrogmilchLiebfraumilch and calm the f**k down?


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