COCAINE DOESN’T GROW ON TREES!

cocaine

According to the UN’s annual ‘end of term report’, Columbia has passed Peru in land under coca cultivation, with 69,000 hectares ‘ring-fenced’ for cocaine production against Peru’s 49,900 hectares. On receipt of this ‘relegating’ news, Peru’s permanent representative to the United Nations in New York, Mr Gustavo Meza-Cuadra, stated publically, “The fact that the production of Columbian marching powder has ‘stolen the march’ on my own country’s high-quality nose candy product, is something that’s got right up my nose!”

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