keep calm and take a radioactive shit

When it comes to the Summer Olympic Games in 2016 and 2020, it may be elite athletes should take every precaution when entering the water where pool events, endurance swimming and boating is concerned! Athletes in the 2016 Rio Summer Olympics will be swimming in and boating in waters so contaminated with human faeces that they risk becoming violently ill and unable to compete. The shit really has hit the fan where the IOC is concerned. Members have already floated a suggestion that all water sports competitors should wear snorkel equipment! Some sewage test measured up to 1.7 million times the level of what would be considered hazardous on a typical Southern California beach! It might be safer to swim in shark-infested waters! Organisers of the Rio Olympics were about to accuse members of the IOC of scaremongering, that was until thousands of dead fish washed ashore in the Jacarepagua Lagoon, next to Rio de Janeiro’s Olympic Park!

Meanwhile, over in Tokyo, there are still concerns that water flowing up from the Fukushima nuclear disaster zone is so radioactive, open water Olympians may emerge from the sea in 2020 sporting…gills! It comes as no surprise to me supplies of iodine tablets are already being stockpiled. Fukushima indeed!


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