…while I was cutting my toenails!
“David, I’d like you to become Britain’s next ambassador to the United Nations and to the European Union.”
“But Mr Trump…Presidente erect…what about Theresa May, won’t she have something to say about it?”
“Listen David, once I’ve bedded the wench, she’ll do what she’s told. Anyway, everyone knows it’s America that decides British foreign policy!”
Naturally I accepted both posts and finished cutting my toenails.