ARE YOU BRAVE ENOUGH TO CYCLE IN LONDON?

English: A commuter cyclist in the London morn...

English: A commuter cyclist in the London morning rush hour, kitted out in specialist cycling gear (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Taking into account the large sums of rate payers money the Mayor for London Boris Johnson has spent on road safety for cyclists, and the sums he has pledged to spend in the immediate future for the same, it has been suggested in some circles that cyclists should pay a nominal road tax to use the roads, of say £20:00 a year, capped for ten years. I’m not a cyclist, and I’m neither for or against such an introduction, but it is something to ponder. The immediate concern of course is to reduce deaths of cyclists. I’m not sure how a nominal road tax would achieve that? Personally, I would encourage cyclists to fix mirrors to their handlebars. Am I brave enough to cycle in London? No bloody way! I recall what my late father once said to me; “David, better be 10 minutes late in this life than 5 years early to the next life!”

LONDON MAYOR BORIS JOHNSON FINALLY COMES OUT OF THE CLOSET!

Boris-johnson

Boris-johnson (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In an effort to attract billions of pounds of Arab investment for the capital, whilst addressing the Ninth World Islamic Economic Forum Boris Johnson boasted of being the first Mayor of London of ‘Muslim extraction’. Apparently, his great-great-grandfather Ahmed Hamdi, was a Muslim entrepreneur who made his money in beeswax in Istanbul, where beeswax candles were required to light the mosques. The bottom fell out of beeswax when American Thomas Edison invented the electric light bulb, whereupon Mr Hamdi went on to become politician and journalist right up to the point he was assassinated.

Well, what a revelation! Mr Johnson is certainly the first blue-eyed, blond Muslim I’ve ever seen. Presumably the man is circumcised? If not, he had better hurry up and get it done before the Arab billions migrates to France, where no doubt Mr Johnson will claim heritage there too!

HOW MANY LANGUAGES DO ‘YOU’ SPEAK?

English: Mayor of London, Boris Johnson poses ...

English: Mayor of London, Boris Johnson poses for a photo prior to ringing the opening bell at NASDAQ on September 14, 2009. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Whilst on a six-day trade mission to China, ex Haircut 100 boy band member, London Mayor Boris Johnson hinted that he thought British schoolchildren should learn to speak Mandarin as well as learning about the culture and history of China to prepare them for the global battle for jobs.Whereas I understand where Mr Johnson is coming from, I suggest before British schoolchildren learn Mandarin, they should first master English, for there is precious little evidence they can speak it correctly, or indeed write English correctly. If our children cannot master a language with an alphabet consisting of 26 letters, how on earth are they going to master a language containing 4000 characters?

And as far as learning about the history of China is concerned, surely British children’s time would be better spent learning about rich British history, of which they know very little! I don’t mean to sound pompous, but many British schoolchildren seem to take pride in basking in ignorance. To a large extent Britain shaped the world, controlling half of it for several hundred years while our Navy controlled the seaways. Why should anyone be forced to learn the language and understand the culture of a country that doesn’t know the meaning of democracy? China is after all. one of the worst human rights violators in the world. It is a country whose leaders take a particular delight in every so often loosening then tightening the choke lead on its North Korean Rottweiler! Happy to profit from someone else’s genius, China has spent decades stealing intellectual property, refusing to recognise international patents. And by the way, is not China the hacking capital of the world? China is to despised, not revered! Do yourself a favour…don’t get sucked in by clever PR! China is nothing more than a dictatorship!

 *On this blog I particularly look forward to comments. If you think I’ve been too harsh, say so!

LONDON MAYOR’S TRANSPORT CHIEF AND £140 AN HOUR HOOKER!

Double-decker on route 38 - geograph.org.uk - ...

Double-decker on route 38 – geograph.org.uk – 1588023 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

London mayor Boris Johnson’s transport chief, married father-of-two Sir Peter Hendy has JAMMED himself up after Rachael Grundy, a £140-an-hour call girl claimed she had a torrid affair with him lasting nine months. The 40-year-old claimed she and the Commissioner of Transport for London began having weekly sex sessions before falling in love. She said the 60-year-old multi-millionaire also agreed to be a financial  guarantor so she could rent a  flat. Sir Peter allegedly left Miss Grundy homeless and penniless after changing his mind when his wife discovered their affair.

Sir Peter, knighted by Princess Anne in March  for services to transport and the community, was with wife Sue yesterday at  their £1.25million Georgian villa in Bath as details of his alleged  affair emerged. ‘I have absolutely nothing to say about my personal life whatsoever,’  he said.

According to Miss Grundy, Sir Peter, who earned £650,000 last year, first contacted her in late 2011 through a sordid escorting website and booked her for a three-hour session at her London flat. ‘We hit it off immediately,’ she said. Hendy regularly booked the call girl, often stayed the night at the man’s London flat while his wife was in the West  Country.

‘I stopped charging him by the hour and it developed into a proper relationship. I fell in love with him,’ she said. ‘He’d give me money but we never discussed it. It wasn’t about money.’  Of course dear! She also described her ‘heartbreak’ when the  alleged affair ended after Sir Peter went back on his agreement to be her  guarantor.

‘I decided to go public with this because I  felt it was unfair that he, who is so rich and  powerful thanks to his public sector job got away with it and moved on with his life.’ So it’s definitely not about the money then? Now I’m really confused…was Peter Hendy knighted for his services to Transport, or for his work promoting PAY-AS-YOU-GO VAGINAS?

BORIS JOHNSON’S THE NEW HYBRID ROUTEMASTER BUS FOR LONDON!

bus of the undead hdr

bus of the undead hdr (Photo credit: eschipul)

Using new ‘green’ technology, the manufacturer of the hybrid Routemaster bus claims it will be 45% more efficient than existing London buses. It will have three sets of doors, two staircases, one conductor and one driver, and hopefully many more passengers. The first full route conversation will take place on Saturday 22nd June 2013. Route ’24’, Hampstead Health to Pimlico. I’ve seen the new bus, and its fantastic. It should be for £300,000 per unit. By 2016 there will be 600 such buses on the London roads. I do hope the 180 million is money well spent. As an ex bus driver I can tell you that after nine months in service many of the new buses will look like shit, mostly the result of vandalism. Incorporated in the design is a large amount of glass and shatter-resistant Perspex. All in all, a fine blank canvass for illiterate assholes to sign their names on and burn with lighters!