Armed Predator drone firing Hellfire missile (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Forever Scorned (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Ex-girlfriend Julie turned on me to an extent you would not believe. I never promised her marriage or children, nonetheless, she cut up my clothes, trashed my flat, destroyed my sound system and computer, damaged my car, put chilly powder in my unused condoms, and even threatened to put an axe in my head. I went to the police but there was little that they could do bar warning the woman off. Unfortunately that didn’t work. Needless to say, my career suffered, as did my health.
It is true, it IS always darkest before the dawn! In fact it was just after dawn broke that I met up with old school chum Mat, to whom I poured my heart out. Having just survived a messy break-up himself, he understood my predicament only too well. A computer genius, he worked as a civilian contractor at NATO headquarters in Northwood, Middlesex.
‘David,’ Mat said, ‘I believe I’m in a position to help you, but it will cost you!’
‘Mat,’ I replied, ‘money is no object where the banishment of EVIL is concerned.’
‘Well all I need is a description of your nemesis together with her full postal address.’ This I happily gave him. ‘But Mat, what are you going to do?’
‘Precisely what I did to MY ex…re-programme an ARMED, unmanned Raptor drone to bomb the f**k out of Witchy Poo!’
‘Really? How fantastic! But Mat…this Raptor, what’s it going to fire?’
‘A HELLFIRE missile.’
‘Err just the one?’ Do you know what, the man was as good as his word.